Bullying is a social evil that is defined as the use of superior strength or influence to intimidate. We have all faced it, and we have all been on both sides of the equation. From the school-yard or on the internet, bullying is ubiquitous.
The aim of this blog is to sensitize ourselves to bullying as well as give tips on how to avoid it. To bring home the point, here is an excerpt from my diary from when I was going through a turbulent time in school:
Imagine yourself squeezed up in a ball alone on a king-sized bed – a ball that is too small in an ocean that is too large. Each thought is like a wave. And with each crashing wave, being able to sleep feels like a dream away. With each “tick” the second-hand takes, more thoughts enter your consciousness. It’s like the hundred metric tons of water that flow from an already inundated dam. In this equation, I am a turbine, I bear the force, just because I know that there is no way out. I feel so burdened and so chained to the ground. The weight of the sky is on me, and yet, all I want to do is close my eyes and disappear.
Bullying is something people find hard to recover from. Bullies are like leeches, they want each and every drop of our blood, and until they have it, they won’t get off of us. With each drop of blood that is sucked, we begin to feel that it is not the only thing that is being sucked. Each drop of blood for the leech contains a part of your soul, leaving you more empty than before. With each fraction of our soul goes our self-confidence, our happiness, and our desire to live. After fighting this social evil, we stop seeing the colour in the future. This future seems like it no longer has anything to offer, and there is nothing to look forward to in life.
So here are a few tips for redeeming yourself whenever you’re stuck in a situation where you are feeling bullied:
- Do not resort to physical violence: While I do understand the fact that most bullies are the ones who get physical first, you should avoid physical altercations. When an authoritative figure inquires about the situation, the bully cannot act innocent.
- Report: It is always in the best interest of everyone for you to go and complain about a situation like this. While it is better to go directly to a teacher if you are not comfortable, you can also leave an anonymous tip about the bully. The reason you should go to a teacher in person is that they will be able to trust the source of that tip and also so that they can keep an eye out for you lest another incident like this doesn’t happen in the future. Additionally, when approaching a teacher, don’t resort to anger, as aggression dilutes your credibility.
- Establish dominance: social hierarchies are fixed everywhere. Before trying your hand at establishing dominance, though, it is always better to try and get help from an adult. If that doesn’t work, try and show the bully your strengths. Facing a bully is just like facing your fear. You are going to stutter, and you are going to be scared, but if you show the bully that you’re above him, then they will get off your back once and for all.
- Know when you have to give in: People become bullies for many reasons. One of the primary reasons is to feed their addictions. Bullies try to extract cash so they can get an extra helping of food, buy alcohol, or feed anything else. There is no shame in sometimes knowing when to back off. If you feel that someone is trying to extract something from you, try and get help. Try to reach out to an adult: teachers, police, parents, etc. Bullying is a grave offence, and any adult you reach out to is ethically and legally bound to help you out.
- Don’t give the internet troll it’s soup: The bully is falling into their own spider-net. With each mean message, there are a thousand carbon copies of the same message all across the world. Despite the bully deleting the messages from their device or somehow even your device, there is still a copy accessible. Once you report it (which you should), these copies can be extracted.
Bullying continues even in adulthood, so don’t blame yourself for it or feel that you have done something avoidable to invite it. Bullying is unethical. It is as simple as that! Please don’t allow it to happen to you or to anyone else. It makes a person go to an emotional, turmoil-filled roller-coaster, and no one deserves that.
By Jai Relan